Son, wear pants in public

It is said that one of the scariest parts of parenting is when your children start to mimic you. Well my first born is now two years old and has started mimicking. Sometimes it can be hard to know what is ‘him’ and what is mimic because quite frankly I think I wear pants most of the time but maybe not.

OK, so let’s start with the fact that recently we had a visitor pop around to say hi and drop off the world’s most amazing chocolate slice. It was during the visit that Tyson decided he needed to “go potty”. He ripped off his pants, went to the potty, then strutted back into the room, pants less.

As seen in the Melbourne International Comedy Festival and Adelaide Fringe FestivalThat is fine, our visitor was a mum who has experienced child nudity plenty in her life. However until this moment she had never experienced Tyson break dancing skillz that thrillz. Without pants on, Tyson danced, spun around with his back to our guest, and bent over revealing everything there was to reveal. However, he was concerned that his left leg might have been blocking our guests view so he lifted that in the air in a truly ghetto break dancing move.

Then earlier today I was in our cul-de-sac street kicking the football with Tyson. We were joined by two neighbouring kids, then another three kids, then three adults. It was a larger crowd in our street than a North Melbourne home game.

At one point I ran to get the football that was kicked over my head and as I turning around I saw my two year old running up the street with his pants off and arms in the air. Now I swear he was fully clothed three seconds earlier and I don’t even know how he ripped them down that quickly.

Now my concern is that I recently had two weeks off work and things tend to get a little more relaxed on holidays. My two year old walked in on me getting dressed in the bathroom. I was putting my shorts on and my son looked at me in shock, paused, and then laughed. I realised that perhaps I had been on holidays too long when my two year old finds it amusing that I am wearing pants.

Son, wear pants in public at all times…and do as I say, not as I do.